Clean Your Fridge…Flat $50. (Boulder, Longmont) – Craigslist Ad that I wrote…

This is a Craigslist Ad that I wrote to make money…

Calvin duplicating himself using a cardboard b...

Calvin duplicating himself using a cardboard box, as seen on the cover of Scientific Progress Goes “Boink” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

 

Hello there! I’m leaving my cell number at the top for your convenience…720-369-7249

Imagine this: You pull open the fridge door, looking for something to eat or drink, and you’re confronted by the icky streaks of meat juice or just the gunk that builds up in the door and the sides of the fridge. You spot the fruit and vegetables that are growing mold; and whatever the leftovers are, you’re sure, just like in the ol’ “Calvin and Hobbes” comic strip – something’s moving…it must be alive; but you don’t wanna look. You don’t wanna touch it. You don’t wanna even THINK about it! Yet, each and every time you open that door – that’s what you’re confronted with

….and it never goes away.

Now, THAT’s stress! And as much as we’d like to believe that what goes on behind closed refrigerator and freezer doors STAYS behind those doors; deep down inside, we know the truth…don’t we?

So give yourself a break and a new lease on a less-stress-induced life, and give me a call or send me an email. I’ll be waiting.

Down below are some real reasons to take care of this as soon as possible.

EMOTIONAL AND MENTAL WELL-BEING
The sooner, the better you will feel…really!
So that you don’t turn your brain into mush just staring into a gaping abyss, trying to decide what to do next – thereby avoiding untimely brain damage to yourself and your loved ones
ORGANIZATION:
So you can find what you’re looking for.
TIME MANAGEMENT AND EASE:
The order will help you plan meals much more quickly and effectively
THE MONEY YOU’LL SAVE:
Fewer items in the fridge, mean that you’re less likely to miss eating the stuff that goes bad quickly
When you know what you’ve got and what you’ve not, it’s so much easier to shop without buying a lot of extras
PEST CONTROL:
Ants and fruit flies and gnats, oh my!
HEALTHY BABIES:
Babies, as we all know, lick anything and everything – I once stuck my tongue in a light socket because I liked that bit of “ZIP!” that came with it; and look how I turned out. So in the interest of your babies, don’t let them turn out like me, and clean that fridge. Meat juice might be tasty, but who knows what side-effects there are?
AND LASTLY, BECAUSE OF WHO I AM and most people are not:
I like to clean. For you horoscope-reading types, I’ve got a ton of Virgo in my charts, which means that I am super detail-oriented; and I’m a Capricorn, which you know – we work hard.
I’ve been in the United States Marines…We’re talking toothbrushes and Q-tips, here!
I ask important questions, mostly concerning what you want.

I have a dream….well, I have several, but this one in particular is that every family and single person in America, have a clean and tidy fridge. That’s not too much to ask, is it? Won’t you help me realize my dream?

By the way, this is a real ad…I just figured that I’d throw in a bit of humor to lighten up the mood a bit *smile*

Respectfully,
Nate.

 

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